Bad Driver & a Morning With the McLaren 675LT Spider

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Editor’s Note: Below is a work of fiction. Hope you enjoy the output from a vivid imagination of my son. ‘Bad Driver’ has had plenty of seat time in the 675LT Spider, and despite the pen name he has given himself, he is quite a capable and responsible driver.

Today is finally the day I imagined would happen. After two long months on being grounded, living in the basement, and cut off from the world, my Dad finally let me out and gave me my electronics back. I forgot what the sun looks like, but it feels good on my skin. He kept the basement cold, so it was weird to feel warm again. I shouldn’t complain about the situation though because it really was my own fault that I was in that situation. It all started two months ago when we were hanging out in Montana. The nice thing about Montana is that there is nothing I like to do when it is not covered in snow, so my Dad and I did the one thing we could: go for drives. Given the fact that I still cannot drive a manual, every time I got behind the wheel it was in the McLaren 675LT Spider. We went out a couple times where I was driving so I got pretty confident behind the wheel. Then the fateful morning came.

I’m not sure why I woke up so early and despite trying, I just could not get back to sleep. After staring at the ceiling for 10 minutes, I decided to just get up and start my day rather than trying to turn back over one more time. After I showered and grabbed a quick bite to eat, I sat trying to figure out what I wanted to do while the whole world slept. Then it dawned on me. What my Dad didn’t know was that I was watching every time he opened the safe, and I could get into it if I wanted to. I walked into the garage and cracked the safe open. There it was, sitting in front of me. The key to the 675LT Spider. I knew I would have to be quick in hopes that my Dad wouldn’t find out. I opened the garage and plopped myself down in the driver’s seat. Meanwhile, my father was fast asleep in the master bedroom a few floors up. That came to an abrupt end when he was rudely awakened by the sound of 666 bhp roaring below him. I had forgotten to check if the master bedroom windows were open as I was trying to take it out without him knowing.

I got out of the garage and knew I was toast. As I drove off, I looked up at the windows in the house and was met with the icy glare of my dear Dad, absolutely fuming. I knew at this point that I was probably going to be disowned, so I decided to make my ride a bit longer than I had originally planned to enjoy my last few moments of freedom and financial security.

I took off down the road and headed straight for the mountain pass where I knew I could get some good driving in before I was sentenced to a grim future. Once I got into the mountains, I switched the handling and power modes to the sport settings and went for it. As I was carving down the windy roads, I noticed a few things about the car. Firstly, the car moved instantly wherever I move the wheel, no matter how quickly I was going. Taking on some of those sharp corners was a breeze. I don’t think I’ve ever driven a car that comes remotely close to handling like the 675LT does. Secondly, being the Bad Driver that I am, sometimes I come out of corners a bit too fast, especially if the corner tightens on the exit. Luckily, the 675LT sticks to the road like it is on rails. Its limits are clearly much higher than mine. The brakes are outstanding, I went from 65mph to a standstill when wildlife intruded, and I was still a good 25 yards from the small animal in front of me. Finally, the paddles and gearbox are awesome. While I can’t operate a manual clutch yet, I have a bit of a feeling for when to shift gears, and obviously how to do it with paddles. Growing up playing racing games on my Xbox really helped. It also helped that McLaren made it easy. The gearbox was super smooth on all shifts and threw me into a new gear in a split second. McLaren made it easy for me to drop down to get more torque going into a corner and then easy to power up and upshift coming out and back down the straight away.

Since this was my third McLaren I have driven and the one I have the most seat time in, I could definitely see how they were getting better over time. They must have my demographic in mind (Bad Drivers) when designing their cars. Really anyone can plop down in a McLaren and drive it fairly competently despite the immense capabilities of the car. None of the McLarens have that “I am probably going to kill you” feeling my Dad’s Koenigsegg used to have every time we took it out. The 675LT is probably not the best car to learn on, but if you have the opportunity to, why not.

As I made my way through the mountain passes back to our house, I knew my life as I knew it was basically over. I slowly sauntered back with dread. As I pulled up the road and into the driveway, I could see my Dad on the phone, and I had a hunch that he was speaking with his lawyer getting the disownment papers written up. He looked out the window and suddenly disappeared. I knew he was headed for the garage and as I pulled into the spot, I could see him glaring right at me. I didn’t want to get out of the car, but knew I had to face the music. Dad looked right at me as I was climbing out of the car and said, “next time, try not to wake us”……..I was stunned, euphoric, as this was the last response I expected.

October 2018

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